I started this morning feeling a little sad I am unemployed and not altogether sure what my future holds. I've been reading loads of books, I started Charley's Web this morning and started applying for marketing assistant/coordinator positions.
And then I switched this on. Shooting Dogs is a movie about Rwanda. About the civil war in 1994 between the Hutu and Tutsi tribes. There was a genocide, an attempt by the Hutu tribe, to wipe all the Tutsi tribe out. They killed over 500,000 people.
That's just facts. They murdered people brutally. They lined the streets with the dead. They hacked people apart with machetes. And honestly? The Hutu and Tutsi tribe were not that different. They had married each other and had children. So parents were killed, cousins, friends and siblings. It was sickening.
Worst is the UN knew and didn't stop it. There have been millions of genocides in history ...people do do terrible things in each other. But this genocide was with the knowlege of a body who could have lawfully helped these people and didn't.
When it comes down to it, all the meaning in our life, all our purpose, all the good we have ever done ... means very little when we can die like this in a minute.And everything else paled into comparison. My job hunting feels trivial. I don't know what my future is, but I do have a future. I will never fear my neighbours picking up guns and shooting me or burning my house down.
I cannot imagine what this must feel like. What fears and horror people went through. What they had to do to survive and how they felt knowing they were going to die.
Seeing this movie, watching this, makes me realise I must appreciate everything I have, and be grateful that I can sit and watch movies while looking for work.