whoosh ...

there went the weekend.

And before I know it, I am at my desk again doing the admin and answering email queries.

I spent most of the weekend, eating, wandering about in the rain and watching TV. I've really become a home body. I met friends for a coffee in the Junction, went in and out of shops looking for a decent bag and walked around. I spent a lot of time people watching and some of the time on the Internet.

I love reading, walking about and watching TV. I love going in and out of shops, reading blogs and doing plenty of nothing. I am 32 years old and I am becoming completely and utterly boring.

My idea of meaning and enjoyment translates to a bath, a book (and it doesn't even have to be a good one) I am reading The Bachelorette Party which would really not be considered a good book. It's quite predictable, but it is well written and I need to read whatever I can get my hands on at the moment.

and a walk/shop. I'm just not into small talk or going out and I am scared. I am scared that I'll become a complete hermit. And I am also scared of being lonely.

I went out with a friend for dinner last week and we went and sat and talked which is wonderful but I am not exactly going to meet someone reading or walking with a friend in Bondi or grabbing a coffee. I am certainly not going to meet anyone (and I don't even mean a significant man ... I just mean getting myself out there) sitting at home watching some episodes of How I met your Mother ... which I love.

I feel content. I have a beautiful flat, a fantastic courtyard and enough things to do with my time. I can write blog posts, read books, bath and meet friends out for lunch.

but when is staying home by yourself healthy? And when is staying at home by yourself hermit - like and moving into territory like not even wanting to make small talk with someone, anyone or not even going out on a Saturday night.

I love this person I am becoming but I am scared of being alone.